Well, this is probably my final post here on Embrocation Cycling Journal. It’s been a swell run, and I appreciate the chance to vent a few times. But with the judgement day happening on Saturday May 21, according to a few whacko Christian groups, (Pardon the redundancy. Zing!) like Family Radio, chances are good this rag will be one of the first things to be annihilated by the second coming. It seems like this occasion will be marked by incredible violence and likely a worldwide soundtrack blasting from some celestial boombox. The song, I think, will be operatic with a sad yet powerful string section exaggerating the point. In fact, this scene has already happened. It starred Willem Dafoe in a movie called “Boondock Saints.”
There was a fire fight indeed. Of all the bullets fired in this two minute scene of constant gun-blazing, fully four (4) actually made contact with intended targets. Perhaps they should wear sunglasses with clearer lenses… If all law enforcement had the passion that Dafoe portrays in his role as Agent Smecker, I think crime fighters would have a much better reputation among the bad guys. Such intensity!
In this scene, Il Duce, the Duke, is obviously the second coming of, well, someone, and he is ridding the world, or at least the front lawn of this house, of, well, something. A rapture. Appropriately, Il Duce is played by an actor named Billy Connolly. He’s an Irish fellow hired by Italians to “take care of” made men in Boston. Connolly played the teacher in the later half of what television show from the late 80’s and early 90’s? Hint, other character names include Arvid Arbuckle and a fat guy named Dennis.
Lengthy non-sequitur complete.
What bums me out most about the end of the world as we know it is that I’m suffering from a bit of nasal and chest congestion. I can handle the sinus stuffiness just fine but when it gets in the lungs it’s just annoying. You’re not supposed to ride, and when you do you can’t do anything because any deep breath results in sharp pain followed by relentless coughing and hacking of yellow goop. Not the last thing I want to be doing before the ship sails! Today was better than the last two days, though. I was able to ride in 70 degree weather with my mates up a phenomenal gravel climb known as Dixie Mountain Road.
I speak of this road frequently as it is deserving of praise and mention. On the way over to Dixie, we rode through Bird Land and the birds were en forme. The peacocks sang, the guinea fowl scurried in small groups, the two dogs (I know, not birds, but they live at Bird Land) came out to say hi, and most notably, the two turkeys made their presence known like never before.
Please excuse the fowl language (get it?) and silly commentary. The action is worthy, as one turkey pecks at my thigh. Perhaps he doesn’t appreciate Rapha? Not sure. Now I probably have avian flu in addition to a minor cold. It really is the end of the world. I say good day.
This, too, may be sarcasm.